April & Birthday Adventures

Hiyee!

Happy April! Happy Spring! And yay, Happy Birthday to meeee! I get pretty excited when it comes to my birthday. The weather gets pretty and the blooms come out. The early birds are out and loud in the mornings. Easter was a nice, fun, filled, and yummy time. And of course my allergies are in full effect. But I do hope you are all having fun and had a great time for Spring Break and for Easter. And enjoying the coming of Spring and all the wonderful events and activities as the weather warms up.

I know I missed February update or post so I just kind of include it in this update. April update and a bit of life update is short this month.

March my son and I decided to take a sabbatical from online and basically unplug for the whole month of March. It felt good and gave me more time to connect with IRL friends and people. I was mostly busy with school and working those side-hustles. Also had to revamp a bunch of art and work related items and things. The rain was nice for a bit there. Great part of living in California. We also set some short-term life goals (at least some new ones). I had my 6 month check-up and everything seems pretty good so far. I have to return or reschedule my MRI since I was sick the day of my appointment. The MRI is not my favorite procedure. I yoga pretty much everyday so that part is nice. I am eating healthy too. With the occasional cravings for brownies or chocolate. Lol. But I do my best to eat good, fresh, and healthy things.

What else? Oh the whole dating thing. I kind of gave up on it or have put it on hold. But after I deleted all my online dating apps, in February, I popped onto Tinder to see what everyone was talking about. I really just wanted to get a Valentine’s Day date. And of course I got all the Likes and a bunch of matches. And as always, some were just really not great matches. I did have a good Valentine’s date of coffee and sunrise. He was nice enough but that was the end of it. I did get to talking with a few more matches and one in particular I had a lot in common with so I am still talking with him, as of late. He was 2nd guy to buy me flowers before a date! He’s super cute and super sweet. Also really close so it’s nice I can just text him when I want to hang out. He is also a parent so that helps since I am a parent. I think it was a bit difficult for most of my matches to understand that I am a parent and also am dating. We hang out a few times a week and go out to eat a lot. Which is good since you all know, I LOVE FOOD! Lol. But yes we are getting along great and he seems intent on staying for awhile. I am just enjoying sharing new experiences and cute moments again, and with him. Oh cute thing that I was missing, he does. He likes putting his hand on the small of my back when we are walking AND he holds my hand too. Like OMG right? It’s super cute! But yes, it is a new thing so moments are amazing with him. It’s nice to be with a good guy again. We compliment each other. Like when I give he receives and vice versa. We are also both Fire signs so that should tell you something about our dynamics. I am still just enjoying each moment and really am present when we are spending time together. It’s not a new thing, but it’s definitely a good thing. Hehe.

Ok so back to my birthday month, I am currently a happy girl and loving all the highs and lows. Trying to have a great birthday month as I do each year since beating breast cancer. I am always in gratitude to have another birthday to celebrate. Thankful to have more time to enjoy all the little things that I use to take for granted. I know it’s bit cliche, but I really do try to live each day like it could be my last. Not to say that I don’t have moments where a bad day is an understatement, but I am better and able to reflect and see the better side of the situation. I mean bad days are a plenty, I just am able to deal with them a bit better this year. This year is all about health and doing or engaging in things that help me and my son to move forward. I feel we are on track so far. He still needs a bit of guidance but is doing all the good things. I am being a lot more hands off and letting him be and do what he needs to do to feel good about himself and his surroundings. I have taught him all that I can and now its just time to watch him learn and explore on his own. He, too, has started dating or at least downloaded some online dating apps. His experience is not quite like mine but he is finding some enjoyment in the process. Like I said, all things that are healthy and help us to feel good and keeps us moving forward.

30 minutes til it’s officially my birthday. I hope that you are all doing well in 2024 so far. Thank you for all your support and as always, thank you for joining me on my adventures!

See you all for cake soon!

xoxo

Sushi ❤

P.S. If any of you would like to join on my Twitch Birthday Stream do come by and say Hiyee! I’d love to chat with you all in real time. 🙂

February Heart Adventures

Hiyee!

Happy Love Month! Happy Heart Month! Happy Black History Month! I hope you all had a wonderful Valentine’s Day and a good February so far. Staying out of the cold storms that have been on and off this month. Are keeping to your list of 2024 resolutions or in my case, healthy goals. Reading up on Black History Month must read books. I am rereading the classic Maya Angelou, ‘I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings’. I remember reading it back in high school and watching the movie adaptation of it later on in my adult life. Very moving and inspirational of how much the human condition can suffer but can overcome the ugliness of others to find a way to self love. It is true that what doesn’t kill us makes us stronger. It sucks, but true. What other books are you reading this month? What movies are you currently watching to learn about Black History Month?

As always I’ve been fortunate in my dating life this month. I had another Valentine’s date. And like last year, I had met someone (but on Tinder this time) and it was chemistry. I am grateful to always meet kind guys. We met up for coffee and morning walk. It was nice to have someone to enjoy the sunrise with on Valentine’s Day. Then the rest of the day was my other forever Valentine’s, my son of course. He got me an edible arrangement, an orchid, and heart shaped chocolate box. Which has been our Valentine’s tradition My sweet Valentine’s. Such a good boy. I made him my French toast and fruits. And I also got him a heart shaped SpongeBob box with crabby patties. We always just make dinner but he ended up ordering sushi for me instead since I was craving it. He made steak and veggies. And we watched Valentine’s Day movie. Perfect ending to a pretty perfect day.

I also streamed on Twitch with my annual 3rd Show Me Ur Heart event on Minecraft. I have been building hearts and ended up giving a hearts tour on my Minecraft server PinkCraftSMP. I took a heart build request and ended up building one that was red and pink. I enjoy this event and have encouraged our Pink members to build many hearts along our railway from spawn to the stronghold. Hopefully this will become a continued tradition each season. And what a fun way to show some creative juices by building and designing different hearts. I have been building my hearts in honor of people in my life (mostly of the guys I have dated) since I started online dating. What a great way to show my love. I will hopefully get a quick fun tour of each heart and put it on my YouTube. One of these days.

As of now, I have been busy with school this semester. I have 3 classes; Economics, US History, and Business Math. I am trying to focus and stay on top of my classes to pass with good grades. Wish me luck.

It is 10:09pm in California and raining cats and dogs so I will definitely sleep well. Wishing you all love for the rest of the month and some fun exploring.

As always, thank you for joining me on my adventures!

xoxo

Sushi

New Year Growth Adventures

Hiyee!

Happy 2024! I sure hope that you all had wonderful holidays and a fun, safe New Year’s! Ours was as festive as can be and we had a chance to take fun, cheerful family pictures as the clock hit 12! We also wish my Dad a happy birthday each New Year’s Day. We spent the next few hours just listening to music, eating snacks, and playing some fun drinking games. These moments are ones I cherish with my family. We were all so tired and as we got to our hotel, I think I might have blinked and it was morning. I got ready and woke up my son to go get the free continental breakfast. Waffles. Scrabbled eggs. Sausages. Fruits. Juices. Hot coco. And Coffee! Then my son and I hugged everyone and headed home.

With each new year, as many of us do, we try to set a few goals for ourselves. Things to do to better our lives. Things that will help us move forward. Things that will help us heal and become healthier. I try each new year to do just that, become a bit better, healthier and achieve a few little goals. Instead of resolutions I come up with themed goals for the year. Year 2024 will be a better year since it’s an even year! I seem to do better in an even year or make better sense, can’t explain it but always feels better with an even year. Okay, with a few exception, i.e. 2020.

2024 Healthy Growth Goals:

Mind: 1. Read more books. 2. Learn Khmer, Spanish, and French, or as many languages I can. 3. Listen to Self Awareness podcasts to improve how I learn and think. 4. Learn Digital Marketing and Online Marketing

Emotional: 1. Be more secure. 2. Be more confident. 3. Improve my emotional intelligence. 4. Self kindness.

Spiritual: 1. Find meaning. 2. Find purpose. 3. Mediate. 4. Avoid negative thoughts.

Physical: 1. Exercise. 2. Eat healthier. 3. Adopt healthier lifestyle. 4. Improve physical health, i.e. maintain healthy weight.

Other ways: 1. Build healthy, new, long relationships. 2. Improve communication skills. 3. Change mindset to help with growth. 4. Become more responsible.

Below are some Amazon Affiliate links for some books or items I am using to achieve some of my 2024 goals. Let me know if any of these items helped you or comment with any other suggestions you might have to help better yourself.

1- Learn Spanish For Adult Beginners: 3 Books in 1: Speak Spanish In 30 Days!

2 – A Year of Positive Thinking: Daily Inspiration, Wisdom, and Courage (A Year of Daily Reflections)

3 – Gentle Yoga for Seniors, Beginners and Hesitant Men

4 – Rich Dad, Poor Dad What The Rich Teach Their Kids About Money

Thank you so much! Hopefully you are enjoying year 2024 so far. And as always, thanks for joining me on my many fun adventures!

Take care of your self. Be kind and make those moments with all your loved ones and friends!

xoxo

Sushi ❤

Golden December Adventures

Photo by alleksana on Pexels.com

Hiyee guys!

Happy December! Happy Holidays! Happy to each and every one of you! During this time of the year, I am reminded how important every moment can be. It’s a time to remember. It’s a time to count your blessings. It’s a time to appreciate your family and friends more. It’s a time to forgive. And most definitely, it’s a time to heal yourself, mind, body, soul, and heart. It’s also a time to believe in miracles and a time to believe in love. I love how we are all a bit happier and a bit more kind to ourselves and others during this time of year. That’s why Christmas is my favorite holiday! Not only for all the usual things that make it magical or wonderful, but it’s my reminder to be grateful. December 18th was the day I received a clean bill of health from breast cancer. And this year is a huge “golden” year because it’s my first 5 years in remission! Yay! Add epic music here! I will definitely celebrate this milestone with all the people that are special in my life, because I am able to. What about you? Are there anything special during this time of year that makes you believe in something better or the goodness we all strive for in life?

“Let light and love into your life.”- I heard this during my Pink Year or the year I was fighting breast cancer. When the day was tough, I always had someone there to be my light and I always felt loved. So it stuck in the back of my mind and I’ve carried it with me. I believe I have done the best I can to do, just to do that, since that year. If I can do one good thing or have one good thought a day, it’s one good thing sent out into the world. Someone recently told me that life has a balance, whether we see it or not. I believe this to be true. We all end up exactly where we are suppose to be. And most importantly, we all get what we need even though it might come to us in unexpected ways. Life will always keep ticking, sometimes it’s nice to slow down and actually enjoy it. We might forget to be thankful or grateful some days, that’s okay. Just as long as we remember that we are all looking and searching for the same things, to love and to be loved in this thing called Life. 

So I wish you all the best things in life. I hope you find joy. I hope you find what you need. I hope you find happiness. I hope you find success. I hope you find good health. I hope you find peace of mind. And I hope you find love.

All right, enough of my feels. Let me get to some life updates. First off, family and friends are great. I learned that some connections are not meant to be, but no matter what family is family. Friends may come in different ways. And sometimes it’s okay to let go of toxic things or people. I learn that I can only change what I can change, the rest will just be what it will be. Life is too short to worry about the wrong things.

Secondly, dating is hard in 2023. As most of you that have followed me know, I started dating last December. I was in a hard spot and just really wanted to have some adult connections especially during Christmas. I woke up at my usual 3:00 AM (it was actually 2ish something AM) and stayed up researching online dating apps. I ended up finding two free-to-use ones, Bumble and EHarmony. So I started swiping and was quite overwhelmed by all of it. Matches were not the problem, it was the matches that I was getting. So I had to really filter down. After that, I was meeting some really great guys that I wouldn’t have ever met otherwise. Of course, there were many not- so -great- guys but that is just the luck of the draw lol. You just move on and say, “Next?” I have a few special guys that have been there since last Christmas. I have met most of my matches except one, which is pretty darn good. I, like most women, are just looking for a person that is kind, honest, has a pretty good moral compass, can learn from, good conversations, and well not-too-bad- on-the-eyes. And of course, someone you have a connection or chemistry with. I think I have found a few guys that fit that list. I figure if there is not a real connection or chemistry, it’s just one more new friend that I made. And that is okay with me. I hope to find my person that will want to spend time with me, share adventures, share moments, and share their love. Wish me luck.

And lastly, some fun adventures or new things I learned. After 18 years of living in or around the Bay Area, I finally took the tourist cable car in San Francisco. I was able to take my Mom to see the Golden Gate Bridge, close up or underneath. I took a long awaited road trip to Colorado. I visited my land that I bought many years ago. I kind of learned to play the ukulele, You Are My Sunshine. I learned some more Spanish phrases. I learned some more French or rather relearned some French. I came in 3rd for the FabOver40 contest. I reached the charity goals I was fundraising. Started a new online shop for my Heartism artwork. I reviewed so much this year that I got my Local Guide Star on Google Maps. I made it through my first year of shots for new pain management treatment. And still passed all my business classes with B’s! I’m sure there are more things that I have forgotten ,but it was a pretty good year!

Well it’s about 8:00 PM California time. I’m sitting on our couch watching a Hallmark Christmas movie on Day 16th on our Christmas Movie List. Our Christmas tree is lite. All the Christmas decorations are put up to make it festive. My son and I have fun traditions that we do every Christmas so it’s nice to have those. We went to Christmas Loop in Rocklin to see all the festive Christmas light while sipping on hot coco and listening to Christmas songs on the radio. He has had to work a bit more this year but we should be able to head down south to be with my family for Christmas until New Year’s Day. What more could I ask for from Santa? I’m sure there are a few things I want, but I think I have all that I need.

Wishing you all the wonderful things that this time of year brings. May you Christmas be merry and bright. All I want for Christmas is you. Hehe.

To the rest of December, make it as memorable as possible. As always, thank you for joining me on all my adventures this year! Remember to be kind to each other and make those loving moments!

And if I don’t get a chance to write another blog by then, Merry Christmas and happy healthy New Year’s!

xoxo

Sushi<3

Digital Love Adaventure

9/21/2023

Digital Love

A click a swipe on my phone, my finger slides right.

On a cute face, cute smile, that attractive profile.

This day and age I feel like an outsider, an impostor.

Many men out to prove they are the ones to make me smile.

As that song states, it’s raining men.

The challenge is to get chased, to find The One.

We want what we want our hearts being a guide.

I wear my heart on my sleeve with hopes of fun.

Is digital love the same as old fashion love?

How do I navigate online dating to find my beloved?

Don’t need but want a sweet guy to share some moments.

Great cuddles, kisses, and a cozy love opponent.

One day I hope to find you.

Don’t make me wait too long swiping til you.

xoxo

Sushi<3

Golden Adventures

9:06PM September 9, 2023

Hiyee!

Happy September! Here we are with the summer winding down and cooling off. I am excited that Fall will soon be here. I love the cooler weather and the rain. Driving in the rain is another story. Who is excited? I am! How have you been? Are you all enjoying this year so far? What are some of the highlights about 2023 you’d like to remember? If you had only one word to describe 2023, what would that word be? Mule over these questions as I get to the update part of my post.

August was ok. As far as I can remember, I had a bunch of doctors appointments. I also started a new pain management regiment; epidural shots and cortisone shots every few months to help ease some of the pain in my upper body and help with mobility issues with both of my arms. I can’t say that it’s been my favorite time, but it has helped a bit to make my daily life more bearable. The monthly drives to Folsom is always fun. We get coffee , go to my appointment, wait at my appointment, get follow up or shots, grab lunch, and head home to take a much needed nap.

I don’t know about you, but during these hot months, I am a melting puddle of sweat if I am doing too much. Hence the naps. I also got put on a blood pressure medicine that doesn’t help with all my hormone issues. So every day I am hot, cold, hot, cold, and hot all over again. After chemotherapy I became post-menopausal. I guess there are more fun times ahead. I still hope to have one more child by the time I turn 50 years of age. Cross fingers that I will find a nice, decent guy by then. If not, my son will still be the only child. We will see either way.

Dating has cease or is non-existent at the moment. I did write about one particular guy (he wanted me to call him Clarence in my blogs) that I matched with in May 2023 after getting off of the dating application Bumble. He lives really close to me so that was a plus for getting to meet up or hang out with him. He is not bad on the eyes. Smart. Funny. Focused on what he wants in life, advancement in his career at the moment. Gentle. Unselfish in the bedroom. Great kisser. Warm cuddler. Just a well rounded, kind, sweet, decent man. I am so grateful to have met him and to be able to spend time with him when we can. I love our talks about whatever comes to mind or how our days went. I have found myself missing him when we can’t get together due to life and stuff. It has been 4 months today of talking to him and getting to know him. Like I said in the last paragraph, cross fingers that I find a nice, decent guy to have another child with. Clarence is by far the closest to what I never knew I wanted in a guy. I could possibly see myself with him long term. But I have been known to self sabotage these nice “relationships”. So I want to take it slow with him and make sure nether of us get hurt if it doesn’t work out down the line. But I am keeping hopeful.

School started for Spring semester. I only have 2 classes to focus on. It is nice to be able to do well again. I feel bad when I am not a good student because I usually am. My son has 3 classes this semester. He is having fun with his design classes and all the other video game related classes he needs to take. He also is still working at Beta testing video games when he gets called to do so. So fun trips to the Bay Area. We are both doing well this semester. I am actually getting some much needed support during my new pain management regiment through the school. It basically helps me with giving me needed breaks from sitting too long in front of the computer for each class. Gives me print outs of the lessons each week. Gives me double time to complete my homework assignments and special circumstances when I take quizzes or exams that last more than an hour (splitting the test up to 2 or more part). It has helped with my anxiety issues of worrying about if I will finish in time for each week’s deadline. I am grateful.

Speaking of adventures and the Bay Area. My sister, my son, and myself took my mom to see the Golden Gate Bridge. She had been wanting all of us to go as a family and maybe walk the 8 mile bridge but she and my dad are both getting older so it is hard to travel with them. Plus all of my mom’s heat issues due to her nerves. We had a nice lunch picnic at Crissy Fields not to far from the beach. We could see the bridge, Sausalito, Alcatraz, Bay Bridge, and the city of course. The weather was predicating rain but it just sprinkled and slightly over casted. As we sat at the picnic table to eat, it got warmer and the sun came out. We also made a few bird friends. We took tons of pictures and walked along the water’s edge to get close to Fort Point under the bridge. We then headed to the Palace of Fine Arts and took tons of pictures of the dome and the garden and water areas. There were no swans this time, but we did see ducks. My mom enjoyed it. We all had a nice time. All and all, August was beautiful and we made good moments as a family.

September has been good so far. I came home for the week for doctors appointments. So I have had the house all to myself. I was hoping to have Clarence visit but he has not come around as of late. Bit worried but life is what it is. Sometimes you get what you want. Other times, you don’t.

So I bought myself flowers, a dozen roses to cheer me up. And taking small breaks to play Minecraft with my sister has help keep my mind off of him.

It is 10:00PM. I have Superman vs Batman in the background while working on reading in Econ and writing this lovely short update.

Thank you as always, for being part of my journey and joining me on all my many adventures!

Until next time, be kind to each other and go out to make all those wonderful moments!

xoxo

Sushi<3

My First Dating App Adventures

12/15/2022

Hiyee!

LOL. This was one topic I never thought I’d find myself talking about, since I really do not believe in online dating. I am old school.

But the other night, I was frustrated and so sad thinking that this was gonna be one more holiday I was gonna be single… SO I got the courage, at about 2:39am, to look up some free and kind of safe dating apps. There were a few sites that had the ones for hook ups… Those I really try to avoid with a ten foot pole. Maybe in my 20’s I was more incline to do the casual dating hook up thing but… I am older and looking for that one person that will love me for the rest of my life. Is that too much to ask for? Well, apparently it is since the last guy I was talking to ended up the same horrible mean person to me. He made it seem like it was my fault to have feelings for him. And denied that it was a relationship since it was online and I was apparently not “real”….. So after 2 years of being hurt by why these online guys treated me like they did. Just some random girl and that my feelings were nothing. And basically disregard and toss out like trash… I was FINALLY ready to find a new real-ish guys!

I have always been in some sort of relationship and never really had alone time since I was 29. I was just always waiting for Mr. Right to show up someday. Each person I dated was some sort of Mr. Right, but in the end they were just not MY Mr. Right.

But I digress… So the top 5 apps for 2022 online dating were Bumble, OkCupid, CoffeeMeetsBagel, Match, and EHarmony. I just looked at each to see what I would get for the free version. I was already kind of scared to even start on any of these apps let alone pay for them… NO THANK YOU!

So….. I downloaded Bumble… (add apprehensive face emoji here). I followed the semi easy steps of choosing pictures for my profile, adding my simple yet interesting bio, and adding interest and hobbies. Then I was propped to start swiping right if I liked the guy and swipe left if I didn’t. The good thing about this app is that the women has to initiate the conversation. Which is somewhat out of my comfort zone. BUT alas, I started to get likes and within the my first hour, I got over 100 likes. The only problem with this free version, you have to pay to see the people that like you… OMG like what?? So the only guys I can actually chat with are the ones that match with me, meaning we both swiped right on each other.

I know that this might not be a big deal to all you pro online daters out there. But for me its been really long since I had a real physical relationship after my divorce. So slow and cautious wins this dating app race.

I’ve matched with more than 39 guys but some have dropped off as we chatted. I really don’t know how to talk to most of these guys. So I just text them like I would a old friend with some small talk and getting into some introduction questions as they came up. It seems to be working really well with at least half of them.

Tonight is my first virtual date! We are gonna #NetflixandChill LOL. He seems nice from what our 2 days worth of texting conversations indicate. He is also close by as well. We have a lot of common interest hence us both swiping right on each other. I think we will VC as well as this is still very odd for me. I haven’t had any virtual movie nights since last guy over 2 years ago. I think comedy movie was the safest genre. Wish me luck!

As always, thank you for joining me on my many adventures!

Be safe out there and be kind to each other. Gnighty!

xoxo

Sushi<3

P.S.

Please comment if you have any helpful tips or advice on online dating or if you just want to share your own experience with today’s online dating. 🙂

Song Writing Adventure

Hiyee!

Feeling so emotional and frustrated with how I’ve been feeling lately. Not sure how to get myself out of this emotional hole… So I wrote a song or a part of one for this guy that all these feelings have been about. Isn’t that always the case, at least in my case? Yes.

Written after a long argument we had 8/31/2020 @ 3:41 am:

“Us Now”

I push and you pull,

It’s all the same.

You take so much,

As we continue to play this game.

I try and stay,

But it remains the same.

Dysfunctional and my tears so sad,

Who’s really to blame?

*Cause we love so hard,

So fast, for this long.

Deep emotions,

Just keeps us ticking along, to stay strong.

We crash so hard,

So fast, thus far.

How will we ever ,

Outlast these heart scars?

Cause we love so hard, so fast, this long…

<3Sushi

Thanks for joining me on this journey. See you next time.

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Reflection Adventures

Hiyeee!

It is already September. It’s 3:08 am, but I’m still up after hanging out on Twitch. And playing a bit of Minecraft. But what else is new?

So about 2 months ago, I met someone and it was just serendipitous and SO new and just AMAZING! As with most of my first meetings or encounters, it is a slow start (at least from my point of view). But somehow once I allow someone into the craziness, chaotic, silliness, passionate heart of mine, it overwhelms them? I go through the pain of trying to understand how something can go from wonderful to dread in such a short period. I do not pretend to be perfect, in fact I am far from it. But somehow they see me this way then are disappointed when I tell them how I feel about anything or just call them out on things that I observe or just out right get upset when I am not pleased about how the “relationship” is going. I am then left to feel like the bad guy in the situation. So as much as these guys say they don’t want to play games or want to know how it is, they actually do.

I want to be very clear about how I see myself. I don’t always know what to say or pretend to be an expert on anything relating to love or the emotions of so-called love. I am hopeful at most and will try to find love. I have been hurt so many times its getting to be hard to really move on once a “relationship” comes to an end or just falls apart beyond repair. It’s like the stages of grief, I go through them all but one thing that pulls me back to reality is; my son and remembering the hellish fight for my life from breast cancer. I am grounded just knowing that I have a second chance and as much as my heart hurts, I can get through this too (eventually).

Who was I before this person? Who was I with this person? Who will I be after this person leaves?

I will still be just me. Carefree. Loving. Caring. Positive. Cheerful. Stubborn. Motivated. Genuine. Content. Honest. Independent. Loyal. Compassionate. Sexy. Courageous. Confident. Adventurous. Shy. Bossy. Impulsive. Humble. Selfish at times. Emotional. Funny. Lovable. Dreamer. And the list goes on… Do I believe I am these things all the time? Of course not, I am still only human. But these are the qualities that make me me and make other drawn to me.

So why do I put walls up? For the same reason most others do, fear of being hurt. I build walls just like everyone else that have gone through love and heartbreak. We are just programmed that way. But once in awhile, someone comes along and just allows you to be yourself and just loves you for who you are. It just saddens me that nothing last forever, no matter how much you fight or try to make them last. But I am not giving up hope of ever finding it again.

How do I find myself without giving or taking too much from the next relationship? I am not sure and am still learning to find the balance. I will never give up on love or my compasity to love. As so many have said, I’m a catch. Lol.

I know this was more of a rant again, but hopefully a bit of insight to my feelings on how I see myself in love. Hug or kiss the one you love and cherish each moment.

Thank you for joining me as always. Have a wonderful night!

<3Sushi

Photo by Ylanite Koppens on Pexels.com

“So don’t let me go. Surround me.”- Leon

Online Adventures

Hiyee!

Happy first day of Summer! Can you believe that it’s summer already? I can’t believe that half the year is almost done. Guess time flies as you get older. Or when you’re having fun!

So today I notice that I am keeping to my daily posts online. I posted on Twitter, Instagram, Reddit, and this blog. I’m pretty proud of myself. Before a year ago, I spent 10 years trying to stay off the online radar. I even avoided having a smart phone for a few years, if you can even believe such a thing. I was dead-set in my ways to avoid as much negativity and just those really not-great-people in the world. AND that is saying a lot coming from me. I get along with everyone and can pretty much find the good in almost anything. Such bad dramas, I was just trying to avoid as much as I could and the people that came with them. I haven’t had the best luck in meeting guys online, but I did give the online thing another chance. But sadly, it too recently ended in sadness. This is a story I am not ready to share just yet, since it is still too painful….

Don’t get me wrong. I am online for everything. I look up stuff. I watch YouTube videos. I stream on Twitch. I play video games on Xbox One. I play games on Steam. I look up how to clean tough stains. I find cool ways to organize small spaces. I watch movies and anime with groups on Rabbit. For someone that has been offline just over a year ago, I’m pretty quick to jump back on and learn all about the memes and finding that I’m often talking with emotes. Who knew that this is what it would be like, when the internet first came to volition? I am now chuckling softly, as I remember Drew Barrymore’s line in the movie “He’s Just Not That Into You”. With the many conveniences of the internet and technology, it has also been super complicated.

The great thing about the internet, is that I have also met some great people that I wouldn’t have never had a chance to meet IRL. It really is a wonder and so weird at times. But pretty amazing! Who knows where this online thing will go in a few more years, 10 more years, or 100 more years? It is only 2018, we can only wait and see.

Well my day was pretty relaxing. I got some sleep but had bad dreams. But all and all, it was an okay day. Got a visitor that brought over movies that I have been waiting to watch (Black Panther was among them). Had summer food, aka hot dogs, cherries, and a small bowl of raspberry sorbet! YUMMY! Hope your first day of summer was a nice one.

As always, thanks for joining me today!

Cause a little bit of summer’s what the whole year’s about. – John Mayer

Summer solstice 2018